Since my last, seriously emotional post, I have had time to decompress and ponder more on what is going on and what how an open adoption might affects our lives.
I thought about all the friends that we have that we consider family and how we would do anything for them; Rachel and Jake Fry, Jay and Nicole W., and Jeff and Chris E...... just to name a few. Our ability to love others in this life does not mean that we don't still love our own families. It just means that Heavenly Father has blessed us with amazing people in our life that love us and we love them. Should my child not have the same?
I have been reading lots of blogs about open adoption and what parents of adopted children think and what children that have been adopted and now have an open adoption think. The biggest message that i have received from my reading is that you have to be secure in yourself and the love that you have for your child and the love your child has for you and that having more involvement from the birth parents/ extended family- doesn't make you less of a family...it just makes your family bigger.
I still have a lot of questions and there will still be a lot of things that we have to figure out....but for now I just want to enjoy being excited about Maya and her spirit coming into our home. She will teach us things that we could learn in no other way and she will help us to grow into the people that the Savior wants us to become.
We already know and love a lot of Maya's family. We consider the ones that we do know an extension of our family and pray for their welfare just like they pray for ours. I know that they will be in the Temple with us when Maya is sealed to us for Eternity and I know that this whole process will strengthen each of us in our own different way. For the family that Maya and Ms. A have that we don't know yet....we will love them too.
There will be boundaries. There will be times when it is probably a little weird or uncomfortable. But most importantly there will be LOVE and CHARITY.
When I read that you and Brandon were chosen to adopt, I cried, I was so happy for you. I know you will both be great parents. I have a niece and nephew who joined their forever family through adoption.
ReplyDeleteOne way they keep all the family members involved is with a www.myfammily.com website. It is like a forum type blog where you can upload pictures and everyone can comment and share the lives of each other.
Lots of love
Holly